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By Alan Young

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Tag: Silverbolt

A Mirror, Artly

Location: Swerve’s bar Panel 1: Silverbolt (SB): “Blackarachnia! Funny running into you here.” Blackarachnia (BA1), turning from Minerva: “Oh, it’s you.” 2: SB: “You’re looking shiny tonight.” BA1: “I treated myself to a premium finish. Are you taller?” SB: “I finally upgraded. Look, I’ve got fake hinges where I used to have real hinges!” BA1: “How very skeuomorphic of you.” SB: “Hey, I want you to meet my date.” BA1: “Why would you want that?” SB: “Blackarachnia, this is—” 3: SB: “Blackarachnia from another universe.” Blackarachnia (card art colors, BA2): “Hello.” SB: “Blackarachnia, Blackarachnia.” BA1: “You’re dating my counterpart from another universe?” BA2: “We met on Space Bridge, the multiversal dating app.” BA1: “Silverbolt, that is—“ SB: “NOT CREEPY!” 4: SB: “I’ll get us some drinks while you two get acquainted.” BA2: “We’re both black widow spiders. Are we gonna have to fight for him?” BA1: “Honey, please. I’m a black divorcee spider. You don’t have anything I want. And if you want my advice—” BA2: “I don’t.” BA1: “—you’ll get out now before he starts making you listen to the Joe Rogan podcast.” 5: BA2: “I know he’s a goofy idiot, but we have fun. And when I get tired of him, I can eat him.” BA1: “I tried that. He’s so tough and gamy that I decided I’d rather deal with the divorce lawyers.”
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Published June 28, 2024
Categorized as Comics Tagged Blackarachnia, Minerva, Nautica, Silverbolt, Swerve, Transformers

New Universe, Who Dis?

Panel 1: Sixshot: “Hi, I’m—” Dramatic font: “Sixshot, Ninja Consultant” 2: Sixshot: “But today, think of me as—” Dramatic font: “Sixshot, Love Consultant” 3: A YouTube video plays, titled “Ninja Consultant REVOLUTIONIZES Dating!!!” Text in the video: “Paid Spokesbot.” Sixshot, in the video: “Are you having trouble finding love? Do you feel like you’ve searched the whole universe for a connection and come up empty? Good news! There are an infinite number of universes out there! Let me tell you about Space Bridge, the Multiversal dating app. It’s free to download in the app store. (In-app purchases are required to connect with other users.) 4: Video continues. Sixshot is now surrounded by the bio cards of G2 Skram, MP Kaen, G1 Omega Supreme, and BM Tank Drone. Text in video: “Real User Profiles!” Sixshot, in video: “Space Bridge has millions of satisfied users in thousands of universes, with more joining every day! Your next romance could be COMING through the space bridge right now! But you don’t have to take my word for it. Here’s a happy customer.” 5: Video continues. Text in video: “Compensated Testimonial.” Fuzor Silverbolt: “When the love of my life left me, I was distraught. I thought I was doomed to be alone forever. But thanks to Space Bridge, I hooked up with her counterpart from another universe! IT’S NOT CREEPY! It’s going great! She’s coming to my place for the first time this weekend.” 6: Location: a graffiti-covered alley with a dumpster. Caption: “Later…” Silverbolt: “It’s not much, but it’s temporary. I’m sort of between money at the moment. It turns out that compensation from Space Bridge comes in the form of app credits.” Blackarachnia (card art colors): “You live in a dumpster?” Silverbolt: “Of course not! I live next to a dumpster. I can’t afford dumpster rent.” Blackarachnia: “Hang on to those Space Bridge credits, buddy.”
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Published May 3, 2024
Categorized as Comics Tagged Blackarachnia, Silverbolt, Sixshot, Transformers

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