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Toy Box Comix

Toy Box Comix

By Alan Young

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Author: Alan

Cute Li’l Guy

First panel: Optimus Primal and Rhinox look down at an open stasis pod. Optimus: “Hello, friend. This is Rhinox and I’m Optimus Primal, leader of the Maximals here on Earth.” Second panel: Armordillo, in beast mode, looking up out of the stasis pod: “Call me Armordillo.” Third panel: Armordillo: “Is that a good name? I just came online and I’m not sure I have a good understanding of wordplay yet. Armordillo, maximize!” Fourth panel: Armordillo in robot mode: “It looks like I have a foot that’s a flail and a foot that’s a laser gun.” Fifth panel: Armordillo: “Oh, and there’s a slim but nonzero chance that I could give you leprosy. But don’t worry. It’s—" Sixth panel: Optimus and Rhinox are nowhere to be seen. Armordillo: “—Curable. So I guess I’ll meet you guys back at base? Um, you forgot to tell me where the base is.” Seventh panel: In the background, Rattrap aims his gun at Armordillo’s back. Armordillo: “He said this is Earth, right? Is that the planet with Florida? Maybe I’ll go to Florida.”
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Published August 17, 2023
Categorized as Comics Tagged Armordillo, Beast Wars, Optimus Primal, Rattrap, Rhinox

Son of Baltar

First panel: Star Trek: The Next Generation-style title: “Porcine Elongation.” Captain Picard, pointing to a replicator: “You see, Ambassador, we have replicator technology which creates food and other items at the molecular level.” Second panel: Picard: “We can program your recipes into the computer so you don’t even have to cook. We no longer raise animals just for food.” Kanamit (from The Twilight Zone), holding a cookbook: “Amazing! This technology could end the conflict between our peoples.” Third panel: Kanamit: “This device can create human meat that tastes like the real thing?” Picard: “Some people claim they can discern a difference between replicated and natural food, but I think it’s mostly imagined. I must admit that sometimes I long for the days of my youth. My father would serve real meat that he had slow-cooked for hours. He refused such modern conveniences as replicators.” Fourth panel: Picard: “I haven’t eaten natural meat since my mother’s memorial service. I think you would have liked my mother, ambassador. She was delicious.”
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Published August 15, 2023
Categorized as Comics Tagged Jean-Luc Picard, Kanamit, Star Trek, The Twilight Zone

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